Series review: Campus Cravings by Carol Lynne

I have had a really HUGELY hard time with figuring out things like how to rate these books, individually and as a series, and how to explain that. It seems like the people I actually know who have read them loved them, and I know that Carol is kind of a Mover and a Shaker in the M/M Romance community, but at the same time... I just had so many *issues* with these books!

I will be honest that some of the problems no doubt came from the fact that I pretty much read almost the entire series all at once over the course of about 3-4 days. There are 17 stories in the series; I lack only the last two. I have acquired them slowly over the course of a couple of years and read them originally as I acquired them, without going back to reread the series first. So things that would have been less problematic for me individually wore on me when they were coming at me en masse.

So... On Goodreads, I rated all the books at 3 stars, which is my "problematic" rating (I'm going to link back here from the first book, Coach, rather than post an individual review for each book, because I don't want to write that many reviews. We'll just consolidate All The Things right here.) "Problematic" rating, for me, means that there was enough that I loved about the book that I'm liable to want to read it again some time (in this case, it's a fluffy-light reread; they're all novella-ish/longer short story length) but it had enough issues that pulled me out of the story to keep me from being able to whole-heartedly give it a better rating. And to be clear, probably 85% of my issues were things that could've been easily cleared up by a half-way competent editor -- they were in no way related to plot/characterization/general storytelling ability. So really, I guess 85% of this is "Really? I thought this was supposed to be a Professionally Published story!"

So, let's get right to it. As I frequently do, I'm going to bullet list a lot of stuff of the "This Really Bugged Me" variety.

• A lot of the formatting was crazy-frustrating. There were times where POV or time of day or whatever would change, and there would just be no indication. No breaks, just maybe a new paragraph; meanwhile, there would be an entire blank expanse with nothing but the book title (a complete page, according to my reader) between chapters. It would definitely pull me out of the story.
• LOTS of misused apostrophes -- "the kid's are coming over," "the car's were zooming past," and the like (not actual examples, just the *kind* of misuse). Or places where they should have been but weren't -- "That is Coaches car," "the cat's drank Georges milk." (Again, not actually from the books.)
• Homophone abuse, particularly and frequently your/you're -- "Are you going to finish you're dinner? Your going to be late."
• Some more random "Spell-check Has Issues" words: shoe-in (shoo-in), shear ecstasy (sheer ecstasy), "the damn just broke" (dam), passed/past, desert/dessert, throws/throes (direct quote-ish -- several times characters were in the "throws of ecstasy." Just No.)
• File under "How long has it been since you were in college?" -- when a character who is a student is having a Final Exam during a regular class period. Not just "was lucky enough to get an exam period scheduled for the normal start time of that class," but actually a Regular Class Period. And we're talking the kind of test that should probably take a fair bit of time more than the 35 min the character took to finish -- there should have been several essay questions, at least; it's That Sort of Class. I mean, FINAL Exam. Not midterm. FINAL. There should be a LOT of ground to cover.
• Continuity Is A Thing: Char is in a car accident. Love interest witnesses; has to pry open passenger side door to get to Char b/c driver's side door is a mangled wreck. Later, at hospital, someone (who was at the scene) says something along the lines of "Well, these kinds of injuries happen when you're thrown from a vehicle." 
• Continuity Is A Thing 2: in one book, a char describes his parents as "Mom is black, but Dad is white." In another book, he says "Both my parents are black." Granted, he's blind, & of mixed ethnicity, but still...Author As God needs him to think he's African-American, therefore we must ignore previous statement.
• Things I just Can't Explain: Blind character is reading brail. My spell-check doesn't even accept that as a word. It is Braille. With the capital letter. Every time. Because it is a proper noun.
• Random punctuation issues: Sentences that sound like questions punctuated with periods. (What, do you have some sort of quota you're not allowed to exceed?) Ditto with commas; they're in random places where they shouldn't be and aren't in places where they should. I'm a little extra-aware of that right now, because my kids are back in school and they're bringing home their language arts homework and the third-grader is learning all about proper sentence structure. And, frankly, most of the sentences in these books would fail ALL THE THINGS in my third-grader's text book.
• I get that the publisher (Total E-Bound) is based in the UK, but... as much as British authors (rightly) complain about having their British-set books "Americanized" in spelling/slang, the reverse holds true in some ways with this series -- words like centre, paycheque, & others litter it, throwing me off since the books are all set in freaking IDAHO. 
• Lack of female characters -- to me, it seems VERY odd that a series of stories mostly set on a college campus would have only roughly a half-dozen female characters. Of those, only a handful appear actually "on-screen," as it were, and of those, one is wholly unsympathetic, one is rather disappointingly weak in her personal narcissism, one is literally not completely sane, and one is a quintessential, almost stereotypical "Mother" type.

Let's try to end this on an up note: 

• Despite the shortness of these stories, they had clearly defined beginnings, middles, and ends, so that, even if a conflict wasn't completely resolved, it was clearly well on its way (although there were a couple that I felt ended prematurely in a way that felt like the author had reached Maximum Word Count and had to cram in the last little bit).
• There were some satisfyingly realistic "Life Issues" to cope with -- several characters entered into some fairly serious therapy to deal with their pasts, there's blindness, one major character has a stroke & has some fairly bad reactions to being confined to a wheelchair -- and not too much (but some) Magic Sex Cure-All.
• Characters didn't just pop up out of nowhere right before they got their story, then disappear completely afterward. There's a nice over-arcing story of a group of friends and coworkers, and they grow organically to welcome in new members, and to keep the friendships growing and developing.
• Even though many of the characters are jocks, there's a whole range of characters -- it's not just All White-Boy Football Players, All The Time. There's a certain amount of racial/ethnic diversity. Not a lot, perhaps not as much as there could have been, but there is some. There are also guys with other ambitions besides sports. 

I really did, overall, enjoy the stories and the characters, enough that I may someday buy the last two books in the series. I think it's a shame that Total E-Bound didn't seem to take enough pride in their product to make sure that it would at least pass a third-grade text book test, though. However, that's a quibble against the publisher, not the author.

True Confessions of a SAHM: My Youngest and ADD

I'll be honest here: I've just about researched myself out on this subject, but what's problematic for me right now is the school system. My youngest is 8, and last year he was diagnosed officially with ADD. He doesn't have the Hyperactivity part that is so often associated, and he seems (according to the doctor who diagnosed him, for whatever that's worth) to only have a mild case. And the only meds she could offer me are designed to treat the hyperactivity part of the equation, so for now we're trying to go the non-medicated route.

There are SO MANY PROBLEMS with this, that I'm torn about whether or not this is the right choice to make. The two big problems at the root of it all are school and therapy.

There are maybe four therapists locally who treat kids w/ ADHD who accept our insurance. NONE of them are able to help us. I have called all of them, and talked to them, and visited them, and all of them say they have no therapies that might help VelcroBoy's focus, but they have lots of things they can do for hyperactivity, but ONLY if he's on meds for it. But why would he be on meds or therapy for hyperactivity when he's not hyperactive?

As for the school... Well, let's start with the teachers. Every year, I have had a discussion with his teacher before the start of the school year. This year it was very simple. "VelcroBoy was diagnosed with ADD last year. He doesn't have the hyperactivity portion, just the attention deficit. He is not currently on meds (with the explanation of the bit about WHY he's not on meds)." I explain a bit about problems he's had in classrooms in the past, problems we have at home with homework, a few strategies that have helped in the past. Teacher says, "OK, I've had ADHD kids in my classroom before; we'll work together and it'll be fine." Less than a full week into the school year and the teacher is somehow baffled by my kid exhibiting the EXACT SAME ISSUES I explained to her about! Really, did you think I was making it up? Exaggerating? WHAT? Yes, I'm a SAHM. No, I'm not an idiot. I am capable of evaluating my kid's issues and warning you and YOU are the one who chose to ignore what I had to say.

As for the school as a whole... the best they have to offer, given budget restraints, is that they might be able to come up with a paraprofessional to work with him one-on-one for about 20 minutes a day. Which might, maybe, be enough to get him through ONE classroom assignment per day. But other than that, they don't really have any resources or budget for anything else. And the rest of the local system is in just as "dire straits." The nearest private school is a church school that doesn't have a good reputation academically, and the nearest school that might possibly help him is in Savannah. Which I can't exactly afford -- even if, by some accident of God, it were possible to get him fully scholarshiped, I couldn't afford the gas to drive there and back, plus the after school care DinoBoy would need.

Anyway, I know that medication seems to really help some kids -- and their parents. I'm not judging anybody who chooses that route; we all have to make the decision that works for us. I just don't think it's the appropriate response for my kid. But I'm also feeling like I'm being steamrollered into it by the sheer lack of any other option available to me.

And it doesn't help that every time VelcroBoy has to do something that makes him unhappy, and nearly everything that is not what he wants to do makes him unhappy, he develops a mysterious tummyache or headache or other minor ailment that never comes to anything...

*sigh* I don't know. Am I doing the right thing? Is it time to start thinking about medication? Do I need to look harder for therapies? I just feel lost and helpless about this.

I Read a Book Today...

I know, right? The truth is I've read at least a book a day, if not more (if they're short & fluffy) for a long time now. But this one was so.... Yeah.

It really needs a write-up, if only to try desperately to straighten out the confusion in my head. Several sessions of fine-tooth-combing the sections involved didn't help clear up a few timeline issues I was having. And the worst part? The first time I read this was several years ago, so this is an older reread for me. I don't remember noticing these problems the first time through. I must have changed and grown or something...

Anyway, the book:

Causing Havoc by Lori Foster

Blurb (from author's website): Sexy, sculpted extreme fighter Dean “Havoc” Connor has knee-melting good looks-and thick skin. But not from his brutal sport’s enclosed rings. Orphaned and torn from his sisters as a boy, he has no family. That is, until he gets a letter revealing how much the once-little girls want him back in Harmony, Kentucky.

To stop his sister from marrying a man as sleazy as he is wealthy, Dean finds himself teaming up with her pretty-but-smart-mouthed friend Eve — who’s heard of “Havoc’s” reputation and doesn’t need some hunk trampling on her heart. Now all Dean has to do is protect his sisters, win Eve over, and expose a devious criminal.

And he thought winning the heavyweight cage fighting belt was hard.

Now, me... and it will be behind a cut, because... Here there be spoilers, yo!

Busy Mama!

With the DH in Miami (still!) it has been a daily struggle to find stuff to keep the kids happy while still getting the house cleaned, and spending the minimum of money. And, y'know. Staying sane myself.

One thing that really really helps is that the boys have a friend who lives just a half a block (y'know, give or take) away. 5 houses to the corner, turn left. Three lots up, turn right. Down 4-ish more houses, and we're there! His dad works from home doing customer service (it's not a dream! But I don't think I would be a good candidate; I'm the type to want to organize sock drawers...) so the kids can pretty much be at either place -- here or there -- & it's all good. They usually choose there, because "there" includes a POOL. Not an in-ground pool, but still a pretty decent one. Apparently, the 2/3 of the Barbarian Horde who go down there are in and out of the pool so much it's not worth the effort to send them with dry clothes. Or towels. & I'm ok with that.

The other thing, that I sadly didn't discover early enough in the summer (I'll know better next year!) is that one of the big theatre chains (I want to say Regal, but I am not absolutely positive) does older movies on Tues/Thurs for $1. I don't have the full list, but this summer they've done all the Harry Potter movies in one auditorium & in another they've had something animated for smaller kids -- we saw Pirates: Band of Misfits last week; this week was Rise of the Guardians, and next week is Hotel Transylvania. It's been fun. Popcorn & drinks are $1.50 each, so we can do the whole theater experience for $4 each. Which, with 3 or 4 kids tagging along, is a HUGE BARGAIN. So.

Rise of the Guardians

Honestly, I thought this was a pretty decent movie. The animation was impressive & I liked the storyline a lot. It wasn't too much for my kids, and I think they took the mild lesson to heart -- belief can be a powerful thing, and fear is a shadow in the face of joy and wonder. Anyway, the very best part was watching my kids' faces as they watched -- VelcroBoy in particular has a very expressive countenance. 

So for now, I'm cleaning because I have a friend who's in the area visiting for a couple of days and, while they probably won't actually come to my house, it's as good an excuse for getting some stuff finally done as any... :D

ADD, Calvin (and Hobbes), Math, Nincompoopery, and Hockey

This is the kind of thing that happens to me when folding laundry with my kids...

VelcroBoy: "I hate folding my clean laundry."

Me: "Me, too. That's why I taught you how to do your own, so I don't have to do it for you."

VB: *sighs* "Mommy?"

Me: "Yep?"

VB: "How do you spell 'nincompoop'?"

Me: "N-I-N-C-O-M-P-O-O-P"

VB: "Ok, I was just checking. Mommy, what's a nincompoop? Is it like Calvin or like Hobbes?"

Me: "Well, it's sort of being ridiculous*, or maybe unreliable."

VB: "So, like Calvin, then. He's always messing up."

Me: "Well, I usually think of it as more unreliable and not able to do stuff. Calvin isn't unable to do stuff, he just gets bored and distracted."

VB: "So, it's kind of like he has ADD, too?!" He sounded so excited, like here was his role model, like it's OK to be distracted, because, HEY! It happens to Calvin, too, and everybody loves Calvin, so he's going to be like Calvin and that's *awesome*!

*note: I just looked up the dictionary definition of nincompoop; it is a "silly, ridiculous, or foolish person."

So we talk a little about his ADD, and how he gets distracted in school, but it doesn't mean that he's stupid or bad or anything like that. I tell him that ALL little kids his age tend to get distracted; ADD just means that it's that much harder for him to get back on track and stay there than it is for some other kids, especially when it's something that he's not interested in, like math, or that's boring, like writing stuff over and over again. Then there's a little talk about whether or not we can someday move to someplace like where Calvin and Hobbes live, with lots of snow and hills and trees, and I have to explain that a) I will never live that far north because I'm anti-snow, and b) about the real estate market and that we can't afford the loss we'd take on the house if we tried to sell it right now. Which prompted this:

VB: "I want a job that makes large money!"

Me: "Ok, so what did you have in mind?"

VB: "I could play hockey! Do hockey players make a lot of money?"

Me: "Well, yeah, kind of, but only if they're really good."

VB: "Then, I want to be as good as Sidney Crosby."

So we have a little talk about how Sidney Crosby has been skating and playing hockey practically as long as he's been able to walk, and VelcroBoy hasn't had that same advantage so he's not likely to be good on quite that same level. Which leads to a cry of "But I don't like MATH!" from VelcroBoy.

Me: "Well, you know, there's other jobs, too. Like, you like to do science stuff; you might want to be a scientist when you're older. And you'll have to know a LOT of math for that. And really, you need math to play hockey, too. You need to use a little math to figure out where the puck is going when you shoot it, and whose path it's going to intersect. And you'll want to be able to make sure that you're getting paid correctly, or that whoever you have taking care of your paycheck is doing their job correctly so you don't get cheated."

VB: "I guess I'll HAVE to learn that kind of math, then." *rolls eyes, sighs* *leaves to take laundry to his room*

Me: "Yup, and to do that, you need to learn what they're teaching you in school right now, too!"

All is quiet for a few moments, then...

VB: "Mommy, what's a paycheck?"

Funny, where their little minds drift off to.

Diversity

I'm not naming names, but someone close to me has been posting stuff about immigration recently on Facebook -- stuff like "Like and Share this picture if you don't want to be forced to learn a second language to accommodate illegal immigrants." You know the stuff I mean, I'm sure.

This saddens me, really a lot for several reasons: first, no one is being "forced" to learn a second language in order to "accommodate" anyone. There are several very good and valid reasons, some of them solely about the way our brains create neural pathways, for learning a second language. We are a member of a global society; not everyone we are ever going to interact with speaks only English or even halfway decent English (although my understanding is that it's becoming more and more common a second language in other countries). And if we were in fact being forced to learn a second language for the sake of others, surely there would be a standard language that was the only second language available to learn (maybe varying regionally?) Not to mention many fields of study's jargons can be almost like having to learn a completely different language (have you ever asked or been asked "Once more, in English this time, please?").

Chinese dragon

SO.

My biggest reason why stuff like this saddens me is that it seems to want to homogenize our nation. Setting aside the question of the legality of the immigrants speaking other languages -- we have no way of knowing, just from looking at someone, if they're legal or not; language is hardly a clue. They may very well be able to speak and understand English but choose not to on what they consider home ground, or may have trouble with it for one reason or another.

One of the things I find most fascinating and compelling about the United States is all the little pockets of foreign culture that pockmark the country. You can, in some cases, literally cross a street and be immersed in a completely different way of life: different styles of architecture and decoration, dress, food...and language is a vital and integral part of that. How much less magical would Chinatown be if all the shopkeepers and passersby and customers spoke in unaccented, textbook, workaday American English? What nuances would be lost?

Taste of Greece 2012 -- Chicago (from: Greektown Chicago)

This country was built, as it is now, on immigration, and for many many years there were few if any restrictions. The people who came here came searching for something that was not available to them in their home countries: freedom to make their own choices, freedom from religious persecution, jobs...are we now to turn others away from the search for those same things? I get that we can't support the entire world. There are people here who are still looking for work, who are persecuted for their religious beliefs, even, ironically, those who use their religious beliefs as grounds to persecute others. And there were people harmed -- harmed DEEPLY -- by the way European settlers went about creating nations on these continents. We're not perfect. But it seems to me hypocritical in the extreme to on one hand proclaim what a great country we are, and on the other, attempt to deny all the things which made us.

Irish step dancers (from Savannah Irish Festival)

More thinking-out-loud about girly parts and sexual content of books and what doesn't bother me.

We seem to have a new kerfuffle which is really just an old kerfuffle revisited around the community in which I read and interact. We'll just call it the OMGLADYBITS!! problem and move on from there.

I'm just going to make a brief rebuttal of some things that were said on a site which shall be nameless (if for some reason you don't know but want to, email or something and I'll tell you but you will probably be all head-asplodey) and which I have since removed from my blog feed because really? I don't need that shit in my life right now, and anyway, as a review site it was becoming less and less relevant to my actual INTERESTS, y'know, because of how books that I thought sucked donkeywater were given highest accolades and books that I thought were funny/cute/interesting/otherwise pushed some boundaries in an opening-up-the-mind kind of way were dismissed as lame/trite/blah/whatthefuckever.

ANYway.

I read. I read a LOT of stuff, yeah, some "Literary Fiction" and some nonfiction, and mystery and science fiction and fantasy and and and... yeah. Most of what I read, though, is romance. Or one of the other things with strong romantic elements.

People like to put things in boxes.

Boxes are OK, sometimes. I mean, I like to have a box (basket, drawer, whatevs) to keep my cheeses separate from my eggs separate from my condiments in my fridge. I have a nice little box in the pantry which I keep full of approved snack items for my kids where they can reach, and I have another nice little box out of their reach where I keep the "Only Occasionally" treats. I have a box for the kitty litter, because, let's be honest, you *don't* want that just spreading out all over the floor.

You know what I don't put in boxes? Books.

Piles, yes. Shelves, naturally. Randomly stuck down the side of the couch so I can pick it right back up in the morning? Oh, HELLS yeah. Boxes, though? Not so much. Only when we're moving. Or I'm mailing them to someone. For a while, I kept some in a box under my bed, but then I decided I wasn't ashamed of it, I just didn't want my 7YO boy reading b/c Holy Inappropriate, Batman! So I put all that stuff on the bottom shelf of the bookcase in my bedroom where no one but my mom and my sister ever look, and they're grown-ups and if they go poking and get shocked, SO NOT MY PROBLEM.

Also, do you know what paper books don't have that a lot of ebooks (especially from small presses) do? Warning labels. To me, that's like the Darwin Awards-worthy labels on push mowers warning the user not to pick it up & try to use it to trim the hedges. I mean, really. They should all say "Warning: Thoughts Ahead. Make Sure Mind Open, Or Put Down NOW."

So, when I read romance, I don't go into it with any expectations, beyond the expectations of a minimum of typos. And that I will be entertained (unless I'm reading for some reason other than entertainment. Even then, entertainment is a plus). And if I'm reading a romance written within the last 20 or so years, I do generally expect sex. Particularly if it's an erotic romance, when I expect LOTS of sex. Hopefully well-written sex, but I will settle for cliche and throbbing parts and excessive dampness. The point is, though, I don't look for a particular TYPE of sex. I'll take girl parts, boy parts, alien parts... in whatever combinations and numbers. I've never been "blindsided" by menages, or het sex in a gay romance, or gay/lesbian/trans* sex in a het romance. In fact, one of the reasons I gravitated AWAY from het romance is that it has been feeling too confining. There's a formula for sex, and a formula for characters, and a formula for story. I hoped by moving over toward more of a LGBTQ-friendly reading space, I would come across different types of relationships, characters who didn't fall into the same old stereotypes, new takes on old tropes...

For the most part, I've found that. There's been less of the -LBTQ than of the G-, granted, but I'm digging a little deeper and seeing more. I'm seeing more interracial romances, some May-Decembers where the balance of power is a bit different. I'm even seeing more babies -- with fewer Plot Moppets, although still plenty of those -- which I love (side note: I've seen some people despairing that some of their favorite series are moving toward the baby-crazy, despite being m/m pairings. I'm all like, YES PLEASE MORE OF THAT! because you don't have to be ovaried to believe "Families should grow, not shrink." (quote from Strawberries for Dessert by the lovely Marie Sexton).

So, dear authors who might accidentally read this, Give me girly bits along with the man-sex! I'll read it! The only place I demand to know what to expect sexually is the space where I'm sharing said sexual content with my very own husband in our very own bed. I don't object to warnings about dubious consent because my enjoyment of that is dubious, at best, but I also don't refuse to read it. And I only DNF if I can't actually connect with characters or plot -- some of those stories would probably have been improved by more sex! Give me variety! Give me interesting people doing interesting things! (It doesn't have to be save-the-world interesting; I'm a homebody, so domestic weirdness interests me.)

And, hey, if I ever run across ACTUAL heterosexual intercourse in a romance with gay male protagonists, maybe I'll be shocked enough to actually review it!