Fated Mates, And Why I'm SO GLAD Not To Have One

I don't really know what I'm doing here anymore -- I come over here sometimes to rant and/or ramble, but there's no real sense to it; just whatever's rattling around in my brain. I've read plenty here lately, but none of it has really moved me to write anything about what I've read. I've started series and then lost steam between books because they're emotionally draining and I need time but time disrupts the impetus to keep going, or sometimes because they just infuriate me for some reason...

Actually, that's something to write about. The ones that infuriate me.

There's one series in particular that's driving me absolutely batshit-crazy right now. Which is awful because there are some things I really like about it, but this one issue is hair-ripping, wall-banging, why-do-I-do-this-to-myself frustrating...and yet I keep on going.

I've skipped about -- I've read 1, 2, and 6 of a so-far 7 book paranormal series.

I believe in Love (or Friendship) At First Sight. I believe in Insta-Lust.

I have even been able to buy several stories with Fated Mates.

But this series?

OMG.

Just.

OMG

See, the problem I have with this is very simple -- every great romance needs a conflict of some sort to overcome. With Fated Mates, there's a temptation (which this particular series seems to be taking to extremes) to make those mates absolutely perfect for each other in every way -- it's like their feelings slide on WD-40 until they encounter some external immovable object, usually the objection of some well-meaning friend or family member.

I mean, really. NO personality clashes. No "you said X and I thought you meant Y but you really meant Z" misunderstandings. Nobody stops and says, "Hey, this is all moving, like, WAY fast. Does that seem weird to you?" No "Ummm....dude. I'm not sure I even LIKE you and you're already talking about moving in? Back the F*CK off." Come to that, they never don't like each other. They don't disagree.

It's a perfect little utopian love-nest, and, quite frankly, it SICKENS me.

C'mon...this is not how Real Life goes! People are raised differently, have different personalities and expectations that lead them to misunderstand and clash and disagree! There are bad relationships that make trusting right off the bat like that damn near impossible. There are speed bumps and ingrained attitudes. There are bad habits that have grown unnoticed until all of a sudden you're living with someone else and they're icked out by your habit of leaving your underwear all over the living room while you're skeeved by the way they drink their milk like it's the consistency of pudding.

The thing is, it's learning to live with these little quirks, by working their way through the conflicts and attitudes and issues, that make these characters into full people. These road-blocks to happiness are the ones that allow them to open their eyes to their own oddities and defects and flaws, and help them grow and mature and become someone we all want to be friends with. If the conflict is coming from outside, they can just tell each other "You're perfect the way you are!" Then they confront the offending soul, who either apologizes or is "defeated" some other way, and Our Happy Couple gets to go on their way without having done anything more drastic than cut some poor random drama queen out of their lives. And if they were irritatingly smug and perfect before? Just WAIT till you see how obnoxious they get when you add the overdose of saccharine-sweet!

I know reading -- and, perhaps especially, reading romance -- is all about the fantasy. But I want a fantasy I can relate to. I want to see someone ready half a dozen times a day to throw in the towel, just to be reminded by a simple gesture WHY they're together. I want a couple who can navigate the tricky waters of being together. I want my fantasy to show me that there's hope in the challenge of merging two diverse lives, and that, when two people really want it, they CAN learn to change themselves just a little bit.

Because otherwise? Well, Hubby and I probably should have divorced at LEAST once a year since we got married. But we keep trying, because I believe that ultimately, we are that fantasy couple from the previous paragraph.